There is a game that was created for times in Stillwater when there is nothing left to do but drive around. The goal of the game is to get lost or stumble upon something new and interesting by taking impulse left and right turns down the back roads of the town. Last year during Christmas break, Erin and I went off to do just that (only after discovering that all the pool tables in town were occupied). A good 10 minute game brought us to one of the lakes west of town. Even though it was 10:30 something and right at freezing, we decided to park at a doc and and explore our surroundings. The result was a two minute walk to the end of the dock and back before we were chilled through our coats. No imagination left, we climbed back in to Erin's "Beast" and decided to head home.
Climax of the story: The gravel lot that we had parked in had four sides: the dock in front of us, forest-like trees on either side of the dock, and the road behind us. Backing out of the 20x20 yard lot, the truck's lights slowly flashed across the passenger side of the lot to get the truck facing the road again. With nothing else to look at but the lights in the black-as-pitch scenery, I watched the lights move across the trees, seeing something that shouldn't have been there. Frantic, I requested that Erin run the truck back to the trees because I wanted to know what I had seen. She did so and we were faced with four men, looking to be in their 20's, standing about 15-20 feet from where we had been parked. Reminder: we are out in the middle of nowhere. for the longest 3-4 seconds of my life, we evaluated what was before us and unanimously stated that it was time to go. Gravel flew and we were back in Stillwater faster than you can say "Ol' Yeller's been shot".
Easy enough to say that it was the most thrilling part of the horribly long break. Erin and I were in agreement that if we had stayed 20 seconds more, another story would have been told or maybe not even a story we would have been around to tell. I was left with frightened tears and a whirlwind of thoughts. How many more times have we all avoided danger not knowing it? More than I should probably be aware of. Was it God's hand that moved us out of harms way? Yes. Stupid question.
The Left-Right games is what I've been doing with my life the past month. Close your eyes and make a turn here, then here, then here... Before I know it, I'm all turned around with questions of what to do now. Major options, career goals, life aspirations. I've been seeking council on them all from a number of unrelated people. And then all the advice runs together in my head and I'm left with a headache. Researching all options and hitting dead ends = more stress. Just trying to locate the answer that I desire has left me in the middle of a crossroads.
I know that there are things that are not being given to be right now because I couldn't handle them if I had them. For this I am thankful. I want to be stable spiritually before I enter into certain things (ie relationships, travel plans, life altering decisions). Burdens, some what. Just trying to remember to not to stress of them because as dad always quotes to me "All things work for the good for them that love the Lord." He's a wise man. My aunt gave me words of encouragement a few days ago that spurred a sense of peace in the place where all the stress had been residing. Also reminding me how precious family is...
I think its fairly simple goal of mine to raise a family in the church, have a career that can support me and mine, while livging in a not so big town/city with some animals for recreation. Three or four kids, grandparents that spoil the kids more than their parents, a pumpkin on the front porch in the fall, tree up for Christmas, Easter baskets in the spring.
Climax of the story: The gravel lot that we had parked in had four sides: the dock in front of us, forest-like trees on either side of the dock, and the road behind us. Backing out of the 20x20 yard lot, the truck's lights slowly flashed across the passenger side of the lot to get the truck facing the road again. With nothing else to look at but the lights in the black-as-pitch scenery, I watched the lights move across the trees, seeing something that shouldn't have been there. Frantic, I requested that Erin run the truck back to the trees because I wanted to know what I had seen. She did so and we were faced with four men, looking to be in their 20's, standing about 15-20 feet from where we had been parked. Reminder: we are out in the middle of nowhere. for the longest 3-4 seconds of my life, we evaluated what was before us and unanimously stated that it was time to go. Gravel flew and we were back in Stillwater faster than you can say "Ol' Yeller's been shot".
Easy enough to say that it was the most thrilling part of the horribly long break. Erin and I were in agreement that if we had stayed 20 seconds more, another story would have been told or maybe not even a story we would have been around to tell. I was left with frightened tears and a whirlwind of thoughts. How many more times have we all avoided danger not knowing it? More than I should probably be aware of. Was it God's hand that moved us out of harms way? Yes. Stupid question.
The Left-Right games is what I've been doing with my life the past month. Close your eyes and make a turn here, then here, then here... Before I know it, I'm all turned around with questions of what to do now. Major options, career goals, life aspirations. I've been seeking council on them all from a number of unrelated people. And then all the advice runs together in my head and I'm left with a headache. Researching all options and hitting dead ends = more stress. Just trying to locate the answer that I desire has left me in the middle of a crossroads.
I know that there are things that are not being given to be right now because I couldn't handle them if I had them. For this I am thankful. I want to be stable spiritually before I enter into certain things (ie relationships, travel plans, life altering decisions). Burdens, some what. Just trying to remember to not to stress of them because as dad always quotes to me "All things work for the good for them that love the Lord." He's a wise man. My aunt gave me words of encouragement a few days ago that spurred a sense of peace in the place where all the stress had been residing. Also reminding me how precious family is...
I think its fairly simple goal of mine to raise a family in the church, have a career that can support me and mine, while livging in a not so big town/city with some animals for recreation. Three or four kids, grandparents that spoil the kids more than their parents, a pumpkin on the front porch in the fall, tree up for Christmas, Easter baskets in the spring.
"And its good to be unsatisfied. It keeps the faith and hope a little more alive." -Last Amen by Down Here
A young lady in my life group reminded me that God answers prayers and that "no" is indeed an answer. The direction of life may not be known but the journey will continue with hope and the truth that His hand, ear, and love is never far. So rather than playing this game of mine and putting myself in harm's way, here's trying my best at living only for him so everything else falls into place.
In Him (rather than out there),
-Aeriel <3
In Him (rather than out there),
-Aeriel <3
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