When I am weak, I am strong

** First week of school**
The outlook of this semester keeps changing. Its forecasts were partly cloudy on Mondays with a slight chance of free time but now, not so much. Tuesday seemed to promise a bit more sunshine for the weeks to come but by 2pm that afternoon, the radar showed a group of storm clouds blowing in from the east.


As Wednesday morning come upon the hour or midnight, i laid down to rest for a bit. Note the lack of the word sleep here. On this day, I was to baby sit, go to three classes, and then to work at the Help desk with church following that. As it was also to be 80's day, I thought it might be alright all dressed up and having fun. But when Lillie arrived in the morning, so did the rain, literally. So I pulled on a hat, grabbed my bags and Lillie's hand and headed out the door with my umbrella over my head.


I'm enrolled in 17 hours of class, and working 26 plus hours a week between two jobs. Besides my two intro classes (Psychology and Sociology, I'm in Elementary to Japanese, Acts: The Early Church, and Statistics for Social Sciences 2053. I'm also leading life group on Monday nights at 8pm. Not to mention becomes a Team Lead at the Student Union computer lab last week. With in the last four days of class, I have already had two Sugar Daddy's. This being a highly sweet, frozen coffee drink that one can get in the Student Union a t Java Dave's. I love the taste and it's made me a bit happier as I walk around this wet campus in the mornings.

**Week Two**
Continuing from where I left off, I had a good weekend. Was productive enough to get my bed set up and my room organized more that it was (meaning that clothes aren't all over the floor anymore). Worked a few hours and swam out at the lake for a bit with Ryan, Erin, Josh, and Liz from the UC. Watched movies with the movie gang. But besides all that, I had a really good conversation with my dad about God and where God is.

We had rented the movie fireproof one weekend before school started and spent a few weeks contemplating it. This weekend when I went home to visit with my dad, he and I talked for quite so time about things that were sort of bothering me and how I was dealing with them. It was the most peaceful time I had had all wee long. One thing I talked to him about was that I had been struggling spiritually to keep for the focus of my life instead of work and school. At this point, he brought up the movie fire proof. The scene of the wife finding the book.

Wife: I've read it. It goes for forty days. What day are you on?
Husband: Forty-three...

My dad "When I was watching that part and her husband said that, I couldn't help but think 'What day is God on with me?' Kalin, what day is God on with you?"

I don't recall saying anything at that moment. Just soaking in the wisdom of my father that was reclining in his old chair before me.

What day is God on with me? How long has he been doing these wonderful things for me to get my attention so I turn fully to him. I do claim him as the love of my life after all. He's like a husband trying to ensure that my marriage to him doesn't fall apart but rather grow stronger and us closer together. But he's not my husband, he's my father. A father who will not let go nor leave my side till the end of this earth.

I left my home with an old familiar warmth in my heart.

The rest of the week was stressful and frustrating with a few good memories with friends in the mix. Ryan had his birthday on Wednesday and Liz and I fixed him a cake. There are also a number of new freshman that I think I will soon count as close friends. It was not all bad but it sure was full of trials. I'm alive and kickin though so that somethin.

**Start of week Three**

So, now to the present. The UC hosted the annual freshman/sophomore advance this weekend in which Liz and I attended. And let me tell you, after the time I've had lately, it was time to take a break and just remember exactly who God is. The lessons that were taught over the course of about 20 hours were many. How to look to our heavenly Father as our north star. Being strong christian sisters that stand shoulder to shoulder. Life is going to be an obstacle to work though and will drag you down if you let it but if you have the strength and focus of God, you will make it though just fine. God should not be first in your life but rather the Only in your life. And others that were more personal.

Along with the whole "love God thing" :), there was a great amount of bounding time for the freshman and sophomores. As I did last year, I stayed up later than the majority of the campers to play Egyptian War with my new friends. This was of course, our second game only after a round of clue. Least to say, we were some of the last ones to get up in the morning.

Enough explanations for now. There's almost to much to read. I'll finish with this, I had a great weekend and I am ready to balance my life now with the aid of my faith in my God, and those that I love and whom also love me. I have been weak but its only then that I can truly be strong for He becomes my strength. Glory be to Him alone.

Thanks for all the prayers and encouragement.

-Aeriel <3

Juno: Dog Gone It

He woke me up this morning to go for a walk. It was nice. Just walking down the side walk in morning Stillwater. We stopped to talk to a neighbor and then continued on our way. While walking with him, I could help but think the amount of loyalty he's shown me. He left me the other day and I ran desperatly after him praying that I could bring him back home. He did after I circled the block after him. We didn't have much trouble after that untill a few days later when he decided to just leave one morning on my way to work. I didn't have time to argue and stop him this time. It was a stressful day but I found him waiting at my truck for me when work was over. He was so happy to see me and it looked like he had a rough day. We put this behind us pretty easily.



Now he greets me when I come home everyday. He comes to sit at your side when there are tears though you have a roommate for comofrt as well. He's always by my side when I need him and he keeps the boogey man away. I love how he always answers the door before I do too. He's a little stand-offish at times with new people but if I like the person he soon will too.

The other night watching movies, I had to keep him in my room because he kept trying to distract everyone from the movie we were watching but he calmed down a bit. I think this relationship is going to work out just fine.

I love my dog, Juno.

Aeriel <3

This weekend:

-Learned to clean windows with a swiffer mop
-Moved Corwin into his new house
-Lost a couch in an intersection on the way to Corwin's house
-Cleaned my apartment for move in the next day
-Ate birthday cake for a friends birthday I almost missed
-Long talk with my brother-in-law about life and all that it entails
-Church Sunday morning
-Moved myself into my place with the help of some amazing friends
-Moved Liz in as well
-Changed something about myself
-Lost a bit of sleep
-Prayed to God with Liz before bed

Now I'm at work and its 9 am. I'm thinking about the health of my dad, my brother-in-law, my child hood friend Jesse, and of myself as well. There is a lot on my mind. More so than normal and I'm almost a little scared to see how things will play out. If you read this, please keep the three people I mentioned before myself in your prayers.

In Him,

Aeriel <3

Epic Summer Daze

My generation has become all so fascinated with the words "epic" and "fail" and so everything that you do is either extremely epic or a fail. Or my favorite, an "epic fail". Epic has become a part of my daily vocabulary because of this and due to this, I vaguely remember perdicitng my summer to be the Epic Summer of 2009.As summer is drawing to a close in roughly two weeks, I look back and it seems my perdiction came true.

Starting in May, i left to go over 6,500 miles from Stillwater to go to Oigawa, Japan. For three weeks, I was blessed to read with the people there and experience the culture that I had been facinated with for many years of my youth. I made deep friendships with a few of the people there. Some who were apart of Chirst's family and some who were not.
















I returned home in the first couple of weeks of June. The very next day that I was back, I returned to work, working 35-40 hours a week all summer. Work during the day and either church, parents, or friends in the evenings. I've stayed busy all summer and its flown by faster than I realized.














After 11 days home, I was given a surprise 19th Birthday party by my high school friends though I was the one that told them I wanted a party in the first place. it was the first time all summer that everyone was together under the same roof. For a few hours, we shared stories, played games and ate the cake that Ms. Ashley Wilson baked for me. I felt extremely loved when it was all over.

The past two weekends, I've floated the Illinios river. My first time to do so i might add. The first weekend was with the UC friends. We camped (first time to camp also haha) on the river side Saturday night and the proceeded to float the next morning. My favorite part was seeing people that had been absent from my life gathered around a camp fire singing familiar songs that are close to my heart. Each person holding a different kind of friendship with me with memories to boot. While circling the campfire, we kept the tradition of making smores. Stick in my hand, I proceeded to roast a marshmellow but ended up coating the side of my knee with it resulting with me sporting a small burn. Sunday morning, Monty read to us, we went to the Father in prayer, and we sang praises while taking communion. All in all, the trip was a blast.

The following weekend, I returned to the same place for a day trip of a six hour float of the river with co-workers and friends. We sure met some interesting people but I was able to get to know my new friends a bit better. Listening to the radio, doing the macarena, and bubbles ^___^. In the picture on the right you have Shelly, Mattie, Liz (roommate), and myself.


















Now its come up to the last five days at the house I grew up in. I'm filled with excitement and anxiousness about the year to come. I've led a blessed life with loving parents and awesome sisters while at Jenkins Family Farms but I've chosen to venture out on my own. I've grown in to a person I'm proud to be though I have so much more growing to do. These next two weeks are going to be just as exciting as watching a bug zapper (as i have done twice this summer already and yes, it was entertaining). By the time summer is all over on Sunday August 16th, I'll be left in a summer daze, wondering where the time went while not wanting to go to class, bouncing in the UC lobby, watching movies with friends on Friday nights...

Its all going to be so "Epic"! I can't wait!! :D

~Aeriel <3

Happy to Be Alive

Happy to Be Alive

You are my sunshine
day come and day go
My hand held tight
Story from long ago

Seek thy father
Contrite spirit living in me
Bow your head
Come on bended knee

Time will always pass
Storms may cloud the sky
But through salvation be saved
Live in Christ and never die

Sunshine breaks through azure
Rising each morning given as a blessing
You meet us here on earth
Guiding us to our final place of resting

Strength when I am weak
Grace from up above
Lover of my soul
Mercy as gentle as a dove

Faithful friends
Loving families
Beauty to behold on your creation
I stand in awe of You

-Vanercy (my pen name)


"Sunny with a High of 75
Since You took my heavy heart
And made it light
And its funny how you find
You enjoy your life
When you're happy to be alive."

-High of 75 by Relient K

Home is where the heart is...

Dad, while watching an old western: "Them's Hollywood Indians. You know, Creek, Cherokee, and Hollywood..."

I'm use to this sense of humor being around my house and I have adopted it as my own when I first started wearing brithces. I love my dad. Momma too. For as much as I love them, things are changing again. Mom got a job over an hour away and dad already works 30 minutes that away so it very logical to move closer to their jobs.

I made the decision to move out about Christmas time and now its looking like it was suppose to happen that way. Or at least it does as I'm evaluating things now. For as much excitement as I have right now to have my own place, I'm going to miss the late night kisses and the several "Good nights." that my parents and I give each night. There is a song called Butterfly Kisses and the feelings I have right now make the think of the lyrics..

There's two things I know for sure
She was sent here from heaven
And she's daddy's little girl
As I drop to my knees by her bed at night
She talks to Jesus and I close my eyes
And I thank God for all of the joy in my life
Oh but most of all...

Oh with all that I've done wrong
I must have done something right
To deserve a hug every mornin'
And butterfly kisses at night...

I couldn't ask God for more than this is what love is
I know I've got to let her go but I'll always remember
Every hug in the mornin' and butterfly kisses...

The random quilts thrown at me because dad got bored with the commercials that are on an decided to pester me until his show came back on. The taddling (spelling?) that we do on each other when the one won't stop picking on another. Mom and I's trips to Walmart which start off with me not wanting to go but end up with me talking the entire time. Dad's ever so long but wise talks. The little things that make my house a home...

It was like this when my middle sister moved out and even harder when my oldest sister moved out. My middle sister was my roommate and I adjusted well when she left to go to Ardmore with Charlie. What I found to be shockingly more of a challenge was Sherrita moving down to Ardmore shortly after Jamie did. Being so much a like but having a 10 year age difference, we fought a lot. Odd thing was, I missed my fights with her. It was a twisted way of showing the other that we cared enough to take the time to argue. A few months later and I was fine but the change was intense none the less.

Now I'm facing moving out. I'm not going to be able to see all the random things that happen on the farm nor be able to pester my dad when I get bored like he does me. And that's going to be even more of a change because I didn't think that my parents would be moving too. I figured I could crash at home when I wanted and go home to mooch off them when I felt like it. Home would still be home. Even when I found out where my mom would be working, I didn't think of what that might mean. Even if we keep the house in Stillwater, Stillwater won't quite be as much as my "home" IF and when my parents move. Home is where the heart is and my family is where my heart is.

Growing up here in Stillwater and then going to OSU here was surreal. This is because my friends and fellow classmates didn't really "live" here (with the exception of a few) and so they would "go home" over the weekend and over breaks, leaving me here to entertain myself. I was already home. Even more so since I was blessed to live with my parents my freshman year. I thought I was taking a step to being a "normal" college student by moving out. I was ready for a step...not a leap.

Again, as I stated earlier, home is where the heart is and we are called to focus our hearts on heaven. "Where your treasure is, so your heart will be...". So I guess if I wanted to shut myself up, I could go with actual truth and say I don't have a home here on earth because my real home is in heaven where my Father and Savior dwell.

*Sigh* I know everything happens for a reason and everything always seem to fall right into place. His plan is flawless of course and my family and I are richly blessed to have always been taken care of. This I am so very thankful for. If anythings happens on my parents in, I don't think it would happen for at least six months, but the thought is still there.

School will be starting soon, and with it, basically a new way of life. If things change the way I think they will, I'll also be saying "I'm going home for the weekend." and drive out of this place that I've always known as home. After all, I can't take to much time away from my parents because I'll miss all the corny jokes!!

Later days,
Aeriel <3

"Plum" Awesome!

I went to Theta Pond on my lunch break to eat and just be in a quiet place. After I finished my microwave meal, I sat there thinking; evaluating everything that crossed my mind. I was looking for the feeling that I get when I know that my heart is close to God. So I sat there, thinking, which lead to praying. I prayed about whatever I could think of: His power, blessings, love, will, and His ultimate plan.

As I was nearing the end of my time in prayer, I looked up and a little girl about the age of 5 walked up to me and handed me a plum. It was a, in my eyes and understanding, God's way of saying, "Yeah, I'm here." I was going to leave Theta Pond and head back to work a few different times but I stuck it out till I was at the end of my lunch period. I was waiting for my heart to recognize my faith in Him. I wanted to feel him there even though I already knew he was with me so I started praying about the things that I had been thinking about the previous 30 minutes or so.

I wondered why God would use this little child of his to hand me something as simple as a plum. Was it all he had at the time or was it planned out that way? Only thing I know is that since I chose to stay a little longer, I received a blessing that has put a huge smile on my face.

"And he said: "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like
little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever
humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of
heaven. "And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes
me." (Matthew 18:3-5)

I remembered back to when I was about the age of the girl that handed me her fruit, which was also about the time that I learned that plums were something amazing to my taste buds. I was around seven years old at the time, in second grade, and I was one of the kids that always ate a school lunch and would trade up with other kids at our lunch tables. I hadn't recalled ever eating a plum before the day I was given one in the school lunch line and being the me, I didn't care what it was, I was going to eat it. This was also about the age that I wanted to start doing everything on my own and making my own decisions. At the end of the school year, I remember my mom sitting down to have a talk with Ms. Hicks about her evaluation of me as a student. Ms. Hicks thought it best for me to be held back due to the fact that she worried that I wasn't up to speed with the rest of my class. I was sitting right next to my mom as they discussed my future. It was in the moment that my mom turned to me and asked me what I thought that has impacted the course of the rest of my life.

When she asked me what I wanted to do, I told her that I wanted to continue into the next grade. In my mind, being held back meant that you were not cool. If I would not have made it into the third grade the following year, I would not have made the friends that I had through school, I may not have been baptized for the first time when I was 10. I wouldn't have dated the guys that I have and been through the same heartache that has brought me this far in life. Lessons, memories, and adventures would not be what I know them to be now. Going to Japan, moving in with Liz, starting my Sophomore year rather than what would have been my Freshman year...none of it.

So I thank my mom for asking me what I wanted to do with my life that day, for the little girl who thought of a stranger and gave away her fruit, and for my Heavenly Father letting things happen the way they have. Today I saw the innocence of a child that knew what God wanted her to do. I felt my heart yearn for him and burst with joy in thinking that I'm his daughter and all that entails. I realized what kind of impact one very small decision can have on one life which results in affecting a multitude of other lives. Today I realized just how "Plum" Awesome my life really is.

Great is our God.